1. You have been invited to an event, dress code: Casual/Glamorous.


The word folks is of course, 'Glasual'.


Get used to it, in fact take it out for a shandy.



2. Your ordering some organic cotton and you explain to the drop kick by saying, "You know as opposed to 'conventionally' grown cotton".

A convention is a set of agreed, stipulated or generally accepted standards, norms, social norms or criteria, often taking the form of a custom.

When did you agree or accept chemicals to be smothered on your cotton or apples? When did that become a social norm or custom?

Well little organic mall rats, we now have the power! 'Chemventional'

Usage:

You:         "Good day Roger, do you have any organic apples?"
Rodger:    "What the blazes are you talkin' about?"
You:         "Sorry old chap I meant, do you only have the 'chemventional' apples?"
Roger:      "Your on drugs, aren't ya, sling ya hook!"